Angelina

Whenever I read a book or a series, I never spend much time wondering or speculating how it will end. This is part laziness (why waste time trying to figure out something you’re going to be told anyway?) but mostly because I simply love to be surprised. I really like to read things at face value, and then be completely astonished that I have been fooled. For example, I am one of the very few people I know who had not seen the conclusion of Orson Scott Card’s Ender’s Game coming, and I was glad for it, because it knocked me sideways.

So, before we finally got to read the conclusion of the Harry Potter series, I never really joined in with all the rampant theorising. I know that a vast majority of fans really loved it, and it’s great that they got a lot of enjoyment out of it, but I really, really, wanted to be surprised. In fact, if I hadn’t spent so much time with fellow fans before the release of Deathly Hallows, I probably wouldn’t have figured out that Snape loved Lily. So when I finally got to read that final book, I couldn’t help but be a little bit disappointed that this had already been spoiled for me. I would have loved to have read the book for the first time and be bowled over by this amazing revelation, and to get that wonderful jolt of surprise. If it hadn’t been for all the theorising, there wouldn’t have been anything about Deathly Hallows that disappointed me. I also know that a lot of fans were disappointed with the final book because after all that intense and often far-fetched speculation, it would have been next to impossible for Jo to live up to all their expectations.

So I never theorised. And I certainly never shipped. Or so I thought¦

When I was first introduced to filking, I was of the opinion that filks should always be humorous and, if at all possible, slightly off-canon (I now no longer hold this opinion, but I still am very fond of the funny filk). I truly enjoyed the hilarious filks by Harry Potter filking pioneer The Guru of Sloth, and some of his songs are still on my playlist. So when Pottercast inspired me to write a filk of my own, I knew instantly I wanted to try and write a comedy one.

A second opinion I held on the art of filking, was that the filk should be made to a song that everyone knows. I found that a large part of the enjoyment of listening to filks was the recognition of the song, and then suddenly hearing it in a different way. I love hearing clever twists on original lyrics (nowhere done as brilliantly as in “the Azkaban Tango” by Jessica, Maris, Katie, Heather and Tara, which can be heard on Pottercast #58. “And then his face ran into my teeth / his face ran into my teeth TEN TIMES”). So I wanted to write a funny Valentine’s Day filk to an old classic that people knew inside out, and preferably one that was really camp, or very cheesy.

I really don’t remember how it came to me, but once the idea of George Weasley having a secret crush on his twin brother’s girlfriend popped into my head, it wouldn’t let go. And when I realised that “Angelina” had the same number of syllables as “Desperado” I knew I was on to something good. But I had no idea how to write filk lyrics. My need to make funny twists on existing lyrics actually got terribly in the way, because sometimes lyrics just won’t be twisted. The first verse was still ok: “Angelina / why don’t you come to your senses / my Quidditch defences / are all aimed for you / Oh, you’re a tough one / I know that you like my brother / for me there’s no other girl / but you don’t see me.” And the line of the chorus “you only want the ones that you can’t get” was quite easily moulded into “but you don’t seem to want me, no, you want Fred”, but after that I got seriously stuck, and I had to enlist help.

Fortunately, my two best Scribbulus friends, Aislinn and Witherwings, are both very clever with words, and after I’d asked them both for help, each of them came back with several absolutely hilarious verses and a chorus (Aislinn wrote the insanely clever “Angelina / I know you’re thinking of Fred / but my hair’s just as red / and my heart is so blue”, for example, while Witherwings came up with “Angelina / why do you have to go spoil it / I’d blow up a toilet / if you’d come around”), so that we ended up with more material than fitted into the original song! And neither of them had used any of the existing words! My eyes were opened. Once I realised that you don’t really have to stick to the original lyrics, filking suddenly became so much easier! So, we combined all the verses and choruses we came up with between us, I added a bridge, and Angelina was born. Our first ever filk, and still my absolute favourite one.

Since then “Georgelina” became a sort of in-joke with us; our own little bit non-canon fun. Witherwings even brought our favourite ship up in her hilarious Scribbulus essay “My Book Seven“. And when Deathly Hallows was released, and poor Fred suffered his horrible fate, it got even better, as now the way was clear for Georgelina and their illicit love affair. I even wrote them a poem, shortly after Deathly Hallows came out:

So can you imagine my reaction when Jo’s “Year in the Life” documentary was released late last year, and she revealed in her post-Hogwarts family tree that GEORGE MARRIES ANGELINA!!!!!! Jo! That was a JOKE! I still cannot believe it. I, SeverineSnape, staunch non-shipper and non-theoriser, unwittingly correctly predicted a canon fact!

I love Jo Rowling. The woman just gets me.

Thank you, Jo, for killing Fred Weasley.